My Home Birth Story

I feel horrible that my daughter is almost 4 months old and I’m finally sitting down to write her birth story.  There are a lot of contributing factors (and I’ll be blogging about some of them in the near future), but for now we can attribute it to her being my 4th child.

I’m a VBAC mom.  My Natural VBA2C story is here: I Did It!.  After his wonderful birth experience, my husband and I decided to try for a home birth this time around.  And boy, am I thankful we did!

To anyone who lives in the midwest, you’ll know how bad our winter was this year. My due date with this baby was January 4th, 2014. That day came after weeks of early labor signs, modified bed-rest, daily contractions, and pure exhaustion.  But of course, no labor signs on my actual due date.

January 5th came, and along with it, regular contractions and a blizzard.  I texted my midwife to let her know that I felt like the day was today.  The whole snow storm I had fairly regular and uncomfortable contractions, but I took it easy because I did not want to deliver in the storm and make my midwife have to drive in the bad weather.  I made it through the storm, though this poor lady did it on her own.  Thank God she planned a home birth and had everything she needed at home already!

January 6th came and no labor signs.

January 7th around 2am, I woke up and felt my water break.  I texted my MW to let her know, cleaned myself up, and actually was able to go back to sleep for a few hours.

I was awake and restless around 6am so I decided to get up, take a shower, and get on Facebook!  I texted regularly with my midwife to give her updates, and around 7:30 I asked her to come with the bad roads.  Even though I wasn’t having regular contractions, I had a gut feeling (and I’m sure glad I did!).  During all this time, my husband was busy setting things up, and my 8 year old son was my labor coach!  I’d sit at the computer chatting with friends, and when I was having a contraction I’d go up to the counter and rock while my son rubbed my back.  My favorite memory of this was him rubbing my back while my 21 month old son was rocking next to me, mimicking my breathing!

Here’s a lovely photo of me at 8:20am, right before my midwife arrived.

My midwife arrived around 8:25, and asked how things were going.  At that point my contractions were between 5-7 minutes apart, irregular, and nothing I couldn’t handle with my 8 year old.  She monitored me during a contraction, checked the baby’s heartbeat, and then I went to the bathroom.

While in the bathroom, I had 2 pretty intense contractions and was so relieved to be sitting on the toilet (and only those of you who have had contractions on the toilet can understand this sentiment!).  When I came out, I noticed that my midwife was not in the kitchen and must be helping my husband get set up in the bedroom.  I then proceeded to have 3 back-to-back INTENSE contractions.  I knew I couldn’t handle these anymore on my own or with only my son.

I made it to the bathroom in my bedroom and had another crazy contraction with the assistance of my midwife.  My legs were shaking so bad that I knew I couldn’t do them standing any longer.  I went into my bedroom and kneeled on the floor, laying over my birthing ball.  I immediately felt my baby’s head descending and called for Allison (my midwife)!

She came, started pulling back my pants to check me, and confirmed that my baby was coming!  My midwife was able to help me get my pants off enough to have access to catch my falling out baby!  To quote my baby brother “I had an accident in my pants, but it was a baby!”

Yup, you can still see my pants around my knees!

That picture is timestamped at 9:15am.  Just 55 minutes after I was chatting on Facebook with friends about how I was excited I was going to meet my baby that day!

The best part was my shock at her being a girl!  Even though we were being surprised this time, I had convinced myself I was having a boy.  She was conceived around the time of my grandfather’s death, and her original due date was his birthday.  We were going to name her Horace Albert William after my grandfather.  But she decided she was too cute to be named Horace and wanted to be Lillian Lorraine instead!

Way too cute to be named Horace!

My mom arrived minutes later (she stopped to get her tire fixed on the way!), and my second midwife arrived a few minutes after that.  They were both surprised at what they walked in to!

I am so thankful that we decided to have a home birth.  God really protected us.  I had grown up hearing the stories of one aunt delivering my cousin in the car on the side of the road on the way to the hospital, and another aunt delivering her baby with an unintentional home birth while the paramedics were on the way.  And while I joined the stories of insanely fast deliveries, at least mine wasn’t in a minivan in 5 degree temps on a partially cleared icy road!

And while the delivery was so crazy and fast that I can barely remember it, the bliss and slow-pace following was heavenly.  My kids were able to come in immediately to meet their sister.  They didn’t even realize what was going on, as I was only unavailable for 10 minutes or so!

We sent them out for a few minutes while I got cleaned up and assisted into my bed, but right away they were back in my room, sitting next to me, cuddling, and involved in the whole affair.

My little labor coach!

After we all watched her get weighed and measured, we all snuggled together.

The funniest part is that after all this, they were all ready to move on with their day. Which was perfect, because I was definitely ready to take a nap!

Natural Isn’t Always Easy: My Nursing Story

Nursing is one of the most natural, beautiful, and difficult things I have ever done.

I am a mother of three, and each of their breastfeeding experiences has been completely different. My firstborn was breastfed until he was 10 months old. I tried and failed at pumping for and nursing my second. And I have a beautiful, continuing nursing relationship with my 11 month old.

I was very lucky with my first. I grew up in a large family with a mother who extendedly nursed all of us (though I was the only one she nursed until the next one was born). Breastfeeding was normal to me, I didn’t even consider formula.

Learning To Breastfeed

The nursing relationship with my son started very badly, which is the main reason why we were so lucky. I was not prepared for his birth, so I was easily talked into an induction when he went past 41 weeks. Even though things were progressing, I was uninformed and ended up with a c-section. And my son was separated from me for over 10 hours after his birth, under the reasoning of a low body temperature.

I also found out later that a well-meaning nurse gave him a bottle of formula despite him being “labeled” with my intention to breastfeed only.

Despite what should have been a failure, we were able to forge a nursing relationship. The hospital had a lactation consultant on staff, and I found out when my mom arrived later it was the same consultant that helped her with nursing me! I learned so much about how tiny a newborn’s stomach was, and why it was so important to offer the breast every 2-3 hours. She helped me get through all the initial difficulties of poor latch and inverted nipples, and gave me tips on how to avoid painful and cracking nipples. I am so thankful for her!

When I went back to work, my employer had a whole empty floor where I was able to go as needed to pump milk for my son. When I switched jobs a few months later, they had a room specifically for moms to express milk. I was very blessed.

The only hurdle for us was that very soon my son had a definite preference for the bottle over the breast. Right around 6 months we stopped our nursing relationship, and around 9 months I stopped pumping completely. We ran out of my milk stash when he was around 10 months old. My biggest regret with him is not pumping a few months longer.

Struggling With My Second

With my daughter, it went downhill fast. It all started with another c-section, though this time I was only separated from her for 4 hours (is say this in the most sarcastic voice you can imagine). I took for granted how well it went with my son, so I did not seek out any support this time around.

I “knew what I was doing” this time, but things were stacked against us. I switched jobs within weeks of going back to work. Instead of being in an office environment that supported the importance of breastfeeding, I was working at a fast food restaurant. I was working three 12-hour shifts a week so that I could be home more. But I only had one 20 minute break in which to eat and also pump in a bathroom stall. I could take more breaks, but I would have to clock out for them. The whole purpose though of this switch was to make the same amount of money while being away less, so I didn’t take extra breaks.

I didn’t realize until it was too late how confusing this was for my body. I would be leaking on the drive home, and then be trying to pump one side while nursing my daughter on the other. Four days a week we were feeding every 4-6 hours and the other three there would be huge stretches with nothing than pumping once for a little relief.

Within weeks I was supplementing with formula while I was away since I couldn’t pump enough to keep up a good supply. And soon after that I wasn’t able to keep up on my days off.

I wish now I would have just called a lactation consultant. Or heard of all the supplements and teas that were available. Or found a way to quit working.

But I decided to stop nursing. I’m still upset about this decision.

Preparing For Success

When I was planning for my third, I was determined. I had so many regrets with my first two: the induction, the c-sections, the early quitting, the formula. I switched obstetricians, which was the biggest step in my goal of no more c-sections. I researched everything. I read everything I could get my hands on about natural birth, nursing, and nutrition.

When I finally got pregnant, I prepared for everything. I hired a doula, which was a huge help in providing information, preparation for delivery, achieving a natural delivery, and initial nursing success. And I didn’t take my natural VBA2C for granted to give me a good start. And it’s a very good thing I didn’t!

My third was the first one to have a difficult time latching on. Everything I’d read had examples of immediate rooting and latching by the baby right after delivery. Not my son. My doula and I tried to get him to latch on, but he only wanted to lay there. We tried again every 30 minutes or so, but soon discovered the main difficulty was that he had a tiny mouth.

Thankfully at this point I wasn’t worried about showing it all with the nurses. And thankfully all of them were current or former nursing moms and experienced in nursing support. Every initial latch was difficult to achieve, but I soon figured out how to do it on my own.

The first few weeks at home were painful. Every time he latched on it would hurt. I experienced for the first time dry and cracked nipples and sharp pain until letdown. I was at my wits end, researching tongue-tie and other latch issues. Finally the pain ended around 3 weeks when he finally learned how to open his mouth wide and latch on his own.

I’m so thankful that throughout this I didn’t give up and that I never had supply issues. In addition to having a difficult start, this is also the first guy to bite me while nursing. We had several weeks of him biting me, and then thinking it was funny until I had to take him off and sit him down away from me. Thankfully the only time he bites me now is when he has fallen asleep. It is all I can do to not yell and wake him on these occasions.

There Are A Few Things I Attribute To Our Making It For Eleven Months And Counting:

1. I was prepared. I researched everything I could and readied myself emotionally and physically.
2. I had a goal. With my first two, it was just a normal thing and I wanted to make it to a year. With my third, I wasn’t taking anything for granted. Nursing for a year was a minimum, not the ending point.
3. I am a stay at home mom now. Many women work for wonderful companies that support the breastfeeding relationship (I have worked for two of them myself), and there are rules in place now to support women. But there are many companies that follow by the bare minimum. Some companies are exempt (like fast food places). Plus, not having the bottle to compete with makes nursing so much easier! While I occasionally envy the moms who can get away for a while since their babies will take a bottle, I wouldn’t trade my nursing relationship for anything.
4. I didn’t listen to the “world”. I ignored the formula companies. I surrounded myself with people who viewed nursing as normal. I sought out support when I encountered a hurdle.

So now I have a new goal. Since I know I’ll reach my minimum of twelve months I decided I would love to try out tandem nursing if God gives me another baby in the near future. If that doesn’t happen, 18 months is my new minimum.

Update: I am now pregnant with #4 and still nursing my 14 month old!  God surprised us with this little one, after fertility treatments with the first 2 and months of trying with #3, it was quite a shock to become pregnant before his first birthday while still nursing regularly!  We are down to nursing 2-3 times a day, but we still have a good, strong nursing relationship I wouldn’t trade for anything, even though I’m exhausted and starving all the time!  I hope he still enjoys this for a few more months, and I would still like to try out tandem nursing!

Homemade Homemaker: Deodorant

Since I’ve started going more natural and homemade in my house, many of my friends have been asking me how I make things and how much it all costs.  Many of them were intimidated by buying supplies, finding the time, making the mess, learning on their own, etc.  So today I had my first “homemade homemaker” class, where I invite a bunch of friends into my kitchen, provide all the materials, and let them make cleaners and personal care items in my kitchen.

The first item we made was deodorant.  Here’s the recipe, it makes enough for one average-sized roll-up container.  Items needed:

• 1/8 cup arrowroot powder
• 1/8 cup baking soda
• 2 ½ Tbsp coconut oil
• 1 heaped Tbsp beeswax pellets
• 8-10 drops tea tree oil
• 8-10 drops oil of choice (lavender works well for women, orange oil for men)

Add all the ingredients in a small pot and put it on medium heat on your stove.  Stir every once in a while, until everything is melted (the beeswax takes the longest, but it’s still within a couple minutes), and then stir well to incorporate the powders into the mixture so that it is nice and smooth. It will be a slightly thick, cream colored liquid.  Take an empty and clean deodorant container, twist it back down so that the bottom piece is as low as it will go, and pour the mixture into the container.  Allow to cool for a few hours.

This can easily be doubled if you have more containers to fill.  It should be good for about a year.  It will get really soft in warm temps, so don’t leave it in a hot car!  Also, this is softer than conventional deodorant.  Don’t crank it up high when applying it.  Just barely raise it.  The coconut oil makes it apply smoothly and thinly, it doesn’t take much!

Here’s all the tips and cost saving info:

Here’s the breakdown on all the ingredients:

Arrowroot powder: $7 for a 20oz package at Whole foods (best price I found).  I found it for the same price on amazon, but there you had to pay shipping.  I could not find it at my regular grocery store, but my friend found it in the baking aisle at Dierbergs.  Arrowroot powder is a starch that can be a corn starch substitute, but unlike cornstarch is not a sugary bacteria attractant.  1 oz is used in the recipe, so the cost is $0.35 per stick.

Baking soda: $0.67 at Aldi.    Baking soda is a natural deodorizer.  With 1 oz used in the recipe it costs $0.04 per stick.

Coconut oil: $15 for 30oz on amazon.  I saved money by subscribing and getting it automatically shipped every 3 months.  I’ve seen it at Trader Joes, Whole Foods and other nutrition stores.  I’m sure some can be found at most grocery stores, though I’m not sure of the quality.  I didn’t price shop at other locations because I already had some.  Coconut oil is a natural moisturizer.  Just over 1 oz is used in this recipe.  This is the most expensive ingredient at $1 per stick.

Beeswax: The best price I found on amazon was $10.50 for a pound of pellets.  You can also buy it in a bar and grate it.  I got mine from a local beekeeper.  This is what helps it harden to use as a stick and help it stick to your skin.  About 0.5 oz is used, so about $0.35 per stick.

Essential oils: These are a bit of an investment, but can be used for many things (first aid, diffusing, personal care and cleaning items).  The essential oil kit I bought awhile back was on amazon for $20.  Since you use drops at a time I don’t have a break down, but it’s honestly just a few cents per stick.  These can be left out if you don’t want a scent.

So, if we round up the cost on all the ingredients, it costs less than $2 to make a stick of deodorant  The cheapest “all natural” deodorant I found while searching on line was around $4.30 for an unscented 2.2oz stick.

You can reuse old stick containers or keep it in a baby food jar and apply it with your fingers.  I made a larger batch and put the extra in a baby food jar and plan to melt it when my stick is empty and pour it in my container so I don’t have to make it as often.

This is also safe to use on young children, I plan on my daughter using this on days I know she’ll get sweaty.

Warning: your armpits are a natural detox area, which is why they smell.   This is also why with some people (like me) it seems like I constantly have to switch brands or go stronger…basically my body was sweating through the antiperspirant.  I also would sweat more in other places of my body (gross).  That said, when you first go natural with a deodorant and stop using antiperspirant, you will sweat more for a few days and seem more stinky.  Stick it out.  Don’t put more on.  Pick a week where you don’t care.  I find now that I don’t sweat or stink that bad because my body isn’t working so hard to work past my product, plus I’m ingesting less bad things to get out.

Shared with: Fellowship Fridays

Plumbing Win

So, we have a really slow drain in our bathtub. We’re always trying out liquid plumber, trying to snake it on our own, or really gross, shoving our fingers down there trying to pull stuff out.

So, I searched natural methods yesterday and tried this out, and it worked amazingly!

Pour 1/2 cup of baking soda down the drain
Pour 1/2 cup of vinegar down the drain

It will bubble up and break down what’s in there

After 15-30 minutes, pour 3-4 cups of boiling water down the drain.

Clean!!!

This worked so much better than the conventional methods and costs less than a dollar.

How my family lives on a minuscule budget

Last night when getting ready for bed, I told my husband: “Life was so much easier when my mom watched the kids and I spent my day working with adults.  We could buy everything new, we ate out more, and we didn’t worry too much about money”.  He replied: “Want to go back?”

NO WAY!

There are huge trade offs for convenience:

I am with my kids and raising them.  It would be horrible if someone else raised them instead of me.  At least I was blessed in my mom “raising” them when I was at work, but I feel so bad for people who feel trapped in a bad daycare situation.  And a blessing of staying home is that I am available to help people who want a family option for childcare.

I make the food we eat.  I have time to make nourishing meals.  I don’t rely on a box, or expensive healthy options.  Yes, we don’t eat out much, but it’s a treat now.

Learning to be self-sufficient is fun.  I honestly like making used things seem new.  Gardening is rewarding.  Making soap is actually interesting and fun!

There are many reasons to live frugally.  Saving for retirement.  Saving for a big purchase.  Paying of debt.  Making one income work.  Or if you’re like me, it’s a combination of paying off debt while trying to make one income work.

My goal every month is to live off of $500.  This is not debt payments, utilities, etc.  This is gas, food, clothes and entertainment.

First gas.  With rising gas prices, I try to limit driving.  Thankfully my husband works close to our home, so he used to ride his bike.  He now has a scooter which is great with the heat and it takes so much less time.  I try to plan busy days, so that only 1-2 days a week are in the car.  I fit errands and such around days I already leave for things like Bible study or story time.  This not only saves gas, but it keeps me from randomly shopping.  Unless I’m already out, I walk to the post office or to close stores.  Our gas purchases are usually around $150 a month.

With food, I try to shop seasonally.  It’s really easy this time of year to get cheap produce, especially if you have an Aldi.  I also utilize Shop N Save’s $10 off a $50 purchase day.  That is really the only time I groceries at places other than Aldi and the Farmers market.  With a tight budget I can’t shop organically, but it is totally doable to buy real food.  Ways to save: we don’t eat meat every meal, sometimes not even every day.  Store brand pasta is easy and quick, and you can do all kinds of topping options (pasta sauce, butter and seasoning, parmesan cheese, mozzarella).  Buy fruit and veggies in season fresh, and others frozen.  I do splurge on eggs and some meat at the farmer’s market, but it’s only adding about $10/month to what I would spend at the grocery store.  I garden to save a little, but honestly I haven’t seen much savings with the heat this year, though when my perennial plants (strawberries, raspberries) mature, I’ll save a ton. And, even only having enough for a few meals, I still saved a little.  I feed my family of 5 (one nursing) for around $250 a month.  As a plus for my family, eating this way means fewer calories and weight loss.

Clothes.  Can you say thrift store?  I save even more by only going on discount days.  Especially with kid’s clothes, there are great finds that are barely used.  I’m picky on what I buy, it is clean and in good repair.  You don’t have to buy the ratty or dirty stuff!  And if you have the time, you can find good stuff in the adult clothes.  90% of the clothing purchases for my family is from resale, and you couldn’t tell by looking at us (at least I like to think so).  The remaining 10% is mostly socks and underwear.  And, you can expand your budget by selling what your kids outgrow.  I save the few things I know I’d want the next to wear, and then head to the shops that buy kids clothing.  What’s left I save for garage sales.  What’s left I donate…I hate to store tons of stuff.  You never know what will be in season when the next kid grows that size, so I get rid of it!

And, I save by buying paper goods in bulk on sale.  That way I don’t have to buy it when we need it at whatever price is charged.  Off brand stuff is usually pretty good.  I save a ton by making my own laundry soap.  I’m trying out several kinds of homemade soaps for hand washing and body wash.  I cloth diaper so that I don’t have to put diapers in my monthly budget.

Finally, new toys and entertainment are rare treats.  Birthdays and Christmas are usually the only times my kids get things new.  Occasionally they get things at thrift stores and garage sales, but it’s usually with money they save.  Honestly, kids don’t need a lot of toys…a good box of dress up (thrift store!!!), legos, cars and dollhouses are great options that use the imagination.  The play can be different every time and covers a large spread in age.

What tips do you have to save money and expand your budget?

Homemade liquid soap

So, I have several different bars of soap I’ve been buying and wanting to try, but if you’re like me, you like the liquid version.  I’ve been scouring the internet for recipes, but most of the recipes make a gallon of soap at a time.  I like to make small batches of the different types of soaps I have so that I don’t have half a dozen gallon jugs filling up my cabinet.  This way, I can make just enough to fill up my soap containers.  This way I can have variety for different uses, but instead of running to the store I can just make up a new batch every month or two.  If you like to make big batches, I’m writing my recipe in a way that you can multiply it.

You’ll start by putting one cup of water for every ounce of grated soap into a sauce pan or stock pot.  While heating, add one ounce of grated soap for every cup of water (I grate mine directly into the water while heating).  Stir well, and after it is well mixed set aside to cool for a few hours.  A good option is to make it in the evening and let it sit overnight (but if you’re like me, you make it whenever you can!).  For good consistency, you may need to blend up with a hand mixer after it’s cooled.  Pour into the container(s) of your choice.

More options (amounts are based on 1 cup of soap):

• 1/8 teaspoon of glycerine (a natural moisturizer from animal or vegetable fats) for every cup (this is optional as many soaps already have this).
• 1-2 drops of tea tree oil  (a natural anti-fungal, anti-viral antiseptic.  It helps treat acne, a dry scalp, body odor and repels insects such as mosquitos and lice…great for when bathing your kids!)
• 1/2 teaspoon of honey (a natural anti-biotic and is good for cleaning and first aid)
• 1-2 drops of essential oil for fragrance (and other benefits depending on the oil)

I plan on adding 1-2 of these things to each of my soaps depending on what I’ll be using it for, but the beautiful thing is, if you start with a basic natural soap, you could use the same soap on your hands, for your face and in the shower (this may be a reason to make a big batch, so you can put it in several containers around your house).  My goal is to try it out for my face and body and eventually get to my hair.  If I like the way it works, when I run out of my store bought versions I’ll just start using my home-made soaps for those purposes.  Instead of spending $5-10 a bottle for good natural soaps (or more!), I can make all of it for around $20 a year.

My garden (and a few tips I learned)

This is the second year I’ve had a real garden at my house (which is totally sad because we’ve lived here 8 years).  Most of this is because we have a ton of trees.  We spent the first 2-3 years we lived here cutting some of them down and cleaning up the brush.  We still have over 10 trees in our backyard (we only have 0.14 acres), but at least we’ve cut down the 12+ that were small enough to do on our own.

For years I’d tried those topsy turvy planters, but between squirrels climbing them and pulling the plants out by the roots and poor watering on my part, I never yielded anything.

Last year my husband and I finally cleaned up all the brush that was building up in the back corner of our yard and built 2 8×8 foot beds.  This year, we added another small bed to one of them to plant more strawberries.  This week, my kids and I added a scarecrow, just for pure awesomeness!  This guy is made out of my son’s old clothes so that he’s size appropriate for our garden.

In the far bed I have strawberries, raspberries, tomatoes and peppers.  In the near one I have potatoes, broccoli and onions.  In the pots (and in one of the corners of the bed) I have cucumbers, lettuce and spinach.

Space saving tips

Cucumber does really well on the edge of a raised bed trellised.  See the plants in the red pot?  I have a plant 5 times that size trellised to the fence edging the bed that’s already produced.  I’ve recently added stakes to the pot, and these guys are finally growing.

You can plant quick growing spring plants right next to your slower growing summer/fall producers.  Last year I planted my lettuce around my tomato plants.  By the time the tomatoes were big and shaded the ground, I’d already harvested most of the lettuce.

Don’t be afraid to plant right around the edge of the raised beds.  Like I mentioned before, the cucumbers do great there.  As do onions, carrots, radishes and lettuce.  I didn’t even bother with marigolds this year  which gave me more space.

Pest deterrent tips

Put chicken wire, or some kind of fencing around your garden!  Mine is low enough I can step over it, but I also have it set up where I can easily detach the end so that I can work with it down.  It won’t keep out squirrels and birds, but it keeps out the bunnies which will eat your young plants before they have a chance to produce anything!

Put shiny moving things in your garden.  I have a metallic pinwheel in with my strawberries.  I really need to hang up the pie tins I’ve had sitting in my kitchen for weeks!  Old CDs work great too.  The moving and the reflecting will deter birds and squirrels.

Use containers right next to your house.  Most animals won’t go right up next to your house, and it helps for ease of care too.  Large containers are great for 1-2 large plants like tomatoes and peppers.  I plant my lettuce, spinach and other greens in large pots, and they’re tall enough that the bunnies can’t reach.  In small pots I keep my herbs.  I plan on moving these indoors this winter so I can keep them growing all year.  Another benefit to containers is that you can move them around in your yard to maximize sunlight.  If your yard is like mine, sunlight is at a premium!

Get creative.  Everyone’s tried marigolds, but this year I’m trying red clover next to my garden.  My hope is that the bunnies will stop there and stay out of the garden.  Plus, it’s edible.  The flowers can be used in salads and as a light sweetener in tea (plus there’s health benefits, look them up!).  I got my seeds really cheap on amazon.com.

Watering tips

Not sure how it is where you live, but where I am we’re experiencing a pretty bad drought.  Last year we had a bit of one and I didn’t water well and my garden suffered.   Here’s a lovely photo of me “suffering” while watering…thanks for snapping the photo dear, ugh!

Don’t let your garden go more than a week without a good watering, less if it hasn’t received a good soaking and it gets above 90 degrees during the heat of the day.  One thing I learned last year which has really helped my garden (and yard) is DO NOT water everyday.  If you water daily, your plants can get fungus and mildew.  Also, their roots may stay near the surface, and if you miss watering for a few days they will dry out and suffer.

To help your plants and reduce water use overall, give your plants a good soaking twice a week, every other day if it’s really hot and dry.  It will get the water soaking deep into the ground, causing your plants to root deep.  They will be sturdier plants and will withstand drought better because they are getting water that is below the hot topsoil.  Plus, you’ll use less water because you won’t be daily giving them almost the same amount of water.  It works great for your grass too.

Things in pots, especially in full sun may need to be watered more frequently.  Hanging baskets and those topsy turvy planters that are in full sun need to be watered well daily or they will dry out.

Using “gray” water

If you’re like me, you don’t want your water bill to skyrocket.  You also don’t want to waste good water on your grass and plants.  There are several things you can do to use water already flowing in your house for your plants.

Keep a large bucket in your bathroom and catch the water you run to heat up before you get in.  Basically, any time you’re running water to heat it up, catch it in a bucket and use that to water your edible plants.  You can use your old dishwasher for watering things that won’t be used for food (bushes, flowers).  You could also use bathwater.

They make fancy water collection systems to catch water that goes out of your dishwasher, washing machine and bathtub drain, but I don’t think it’s cost effective.  If you’re looking to do it do reduce your overall water impact though, it may be worth looking into.

Weeding

If you’re like me, you hate it.  But DON’T USE CHEMICALS!   I go out once a week and get rid of the big stuff and anything around my plants that could choke them out.   If I have extra time I’ll get more detailed and get the tiny stuff.  Prioritize weeding around the stuff that will really get affected: berries, root plants, lettuces.  Your tomatoes and other big plants will be okay if you don’t get everything.  Focus on getting the stuff that will go to seed.

Weed when the ground is moist so that you can pull the weeds out and get the roots too.  If it’s too dry it’s easier for the weeds to break, and you can also do more damage to your plants.

One thing I haven’t tried that my sister does, is to cut the weeds and any extra plants grown from seed right at the ground level.  It will keep them from growing and won’t disturb the root systems of the plants you want.  I think this would be more effective with extra plants, but I don’t want the weeds growing underground!

At the end of the year, take all the leaves that fall and pile them up high in your garden area.  They will choke out any weeds and plants (don’t do this over perennials like strawberries), and as they decompose will enrich your soil.  In the spring you can mix it all up and have fresh soil to work with that’s already composted and mostly weed free.

Sadly, weeds will always be there.

Start small

Start with something easy, like a pot of lettuce in the spring or fall.  Plant a raspberry bush or two (though it will take a year or more to produce) or mint, they’re easy to care for but also spread easy so watch out.

Basically, pick 1 or 2 things to start out with and do well, and add a little more each year.  If you do too much it can fail, leaving your discouraged.  Plus, it may be too big of a project so you don’t even start it.

Other resources

If you’re interested in container gardening, a great website is: Urban Organic Gardener.  He’s got something called the “veggie virgin formula”.  If you go here you can enter where you live and it will tell you what to plant when.

If you live in MO or IL, there’s also this put together by Missouri University’s horticultural division that tells you when to plant each type of plant.  It’s really detailed and it’s great.  If you live in another area, I’m sure a google search could find you something very similar.

Had a bad visit at the pediatrician

So, until today I’ve totally loved my pediatrician’s office.  At our 1 month visit he wasn’t too thrilled that we decided against the Hepatitis B vaccine.  But he seemed to at least understand since our son wasn’t at risk and just had us sign a form saying we opted out.  He also sent me home with some general info on vaccines.

We had a long wait in the exam room, but part of that was my nursing when the nurse first came in, and she had to come back.  But when the Dr peeked in later he didn’t see our chart so he left and was gone at least 5 minutes before coming back…

I was expecting some discussion about vaccines again, but I wasn’t expecting a basic confirmation that we were denying, and then some harsh silence.  He made a comment that “we may need to move you to a different pediatricians office, we see a lot or whooping cough here”.  My husband and I made eye contact, and later realized that it felt like a veiled threat to drop us as patients.  I understand that he prefers to vaccinate, but as a parent, doesn’t he also understand the desire to do what you think is right for your kids?

I fully expected a conversation ensuring that we understood what our decision meant.  But I had to bring up that I’ve done a lot of research on the risks of the diseases, at the previous appointment I mentioned that I feel that we are low risk and that I’m uncomfortable with the side effects of the vaccines compared with the risks of the diseases for our situation.   He gave off the vibe that he felt that I was basically insane and it wasn’t worth the argument.

This is a huge disappointment.  I understand that Drs see the worst in an illness, but they should also do research on all sides of what they recommend and understand where parents are coming from.  And they shouldn’t totally shut down on you when they disagree.  I mean, there are warnings on the medication labels for heaven’s sakes, they should be willing to understand my concerns and discuss them.  They should ensure that I’m doing actual research and not just listening to scare tactics.

And I just now realized they didn’t give me any of the normal paperwork talking about how big my kid is growing, and recommendations for the age he’s at.  I guess I’m too wacko to waste it on.  I’m kinda sad because I like to read the lists of what is normal, and what should concern you at certain ages.  I’m really hoping it was an honest mistake.

On the plus side, my baby is growing well.  He’s nice and strong, developing well, and is right on track with all, and even ahead of some, of the 2 month milestones.  He’s also gained over 5 lbs since he was born, well above the recommended ounce a day…I feed my kids cream 🙂

I’m going to open a can of worms

Vaccines.  This is in no way telling you whether you should vaccinate your kids or not.  This is also not intending to share tons of research.  It is also not medical advice.  This is simply my viewpoint and interesting things I have found.  It is also to point out things that I think all parents should research themselves.  It is also to ensure my family and friends that I have really thought out my decisions regarding all the vaccines.  If you want to read a blog that goes into a lot of the research, try out Modern Alternative Mama.  Another great, thought provoking post is Six Reasons to Say NO to Vaccinations by The Healthy Home Economist.

My viewpoint is coming as a naturally minded mom as well as a foster mom.  In most cases, whether my kids are mine biologically or temporarily through the state, I can make the decisions affecting their daily lives.  But when it comes to medical decisions, with my foster kids I have to do whatever is medically recommended.  In many cases, THEY don’t even have a say (like with my former foster daughter who had to get the depo provera birth control shot…).

So, to people who want medical choice, especially with vaccinations, taken away from parents I say “No Way!”.

Freedom of choice is a wonderful thing.  It gets brought up in the argument for many things (many in my mind are horrible), and yet many of these same people want to take away the choice of whether or not to vaccinate children.  If you don’t want to vaccinate, then “you’re a wacko, you’re neglecting your children, you’re harming everyone else”, etc.  Some people want to force vaccination with no variation on every child, with the threat of taking away your children for neglect.  As someone who’s taken care of actual neglected children, this is completely ridiculous.

The choice of whether or not to vaccinate, and on which vaccines to give and at what ages, should be totally up to the parents.  You should be able to delay if desired.  If circumstances or the world around you changes, you can get them when they’re needed.  I’m all for the development of new vaccines too.  My oldest son has been in a flu vaccine study to test effectiveness of different timing and doses.  I’ve been in investigational studies for smallpox and different flu vaccines.  But that doesn’t mean I want my infant introduced to the toxins that make the vaccines work, or my kids to get a flu vaccine every year.

It all comes down to the risks you’re willing to take.

Yes, many of these illnesses are and were horrible.  But simply because we live in a developed country reduces most of the risks that were involved decades ago and around the world today.  We have clean water, good hygiene, great nutritional availability.  But we also live in concentrated populations, our kids are often in daycares and school, there is worldwide travel.

Many illnesses have low level symptoms to where you may not even realize you are sick, average symptoms where you stay home and take some painkillers or eat soup, and high level symptoms where you need medical attention.  In some rare cases, permanent injury or death can happen.  But if you read the warning labels on the vaccines, so do the vaccines themselves.

And then you have to think about the risks you can pass on to others.  Responsible people will stay home when they realize that they’re sick, but you can pass on an illness before you feel sick.  And there are people out there that don’t care if they or their kids are sick, they’ll still go to work or send their kids to school.  But especially with live vaccines, you can “shed” it and spread the illness, especially to those who are at risk like infants and the elderly.

This all goes into the difficulties of being a parent.  You have to decide what is best for you and your family.  You have to decide what risks you are willing to take in all areas of life.  For me, since I stay at home with my kids, breastfeed, and feed everyone a mostly natural and nutritionally full diet, I am willing to take the risk of not vaccinating.  If I were working, my kids were in daycare, or our eating were not as healthy, I would definitely consider many of the vaccines out there.

And I hate when people blame the non-vaccinators for the spread of diseases.  In the case of the current “outbreak” of Pertussis, or whooping cough, 93% of those with documented cases are vaccinated against it.  It is a mutating disease, so the strains change.  Also, you have to get regular boosters to retain immunity.  And people will blame those who don’t get vaccinated for getting the disease, passing it, and allowing mutation, but don’t forget that we live in a global community with regular world travel.  But don’t get me wrong, Pertussis is scary.  Those at highest risk are under one year old, and 97% of the deaths are in children under 3 months old.  But they can’t even get vaccinated until almost 2 months old, and the highest protection you can give them is nursing.  Since I’m doing that and he’s not in daycare, that’s a risk I’m willing to take as that vaccine has high (to me) incidences of side effects.

And in cases of blood-borne illnesses such as Hepatitis B, why are we giving this to all infants at birth?  I understand in instances where the mother has it, but this should really be done at an older age.  From what I’ve read and believe, it’s because those at risk aren’t responsible enough to get it, so the government is vaccinating everyone to irradiate it.

Polio is a widely pushed, scary disease that I always thought I would vaccinate against.  In most cases of Polio (I’ve heard as high as 95%, but there is no scientific proof), the disease is completely asymptomatic, which means you won’t even realize you have it.  But who wants to go back to that horrific time of our grandparents and great grandparents?   Any time before 1954, any cases of temporary or permanent paralysis was regarded as Polio.  Polio seemed to spike in the summer, not in the winter like most illnesses.  So most cases of “Polio” may actually be poisoning related to a toxin like the lead arsenate or DDT that was used in that era as pesticides, which we now know are highly toxic to humans.   We’ve been told that Polio was irradiated in the late 1970s, but today we still have:

• Guillain-Barre (a reaction to vaccines andabout 200,000 have been affected)
• Meninigitis (about 13 in 100,000 per year)
• Lead/arsenic poisoning (rare)

It is my belief that we still have what was considered Polio, but we just now more accurately diagnose what the symptoms are.

Then there is Rotavirus, which is basically diarrhea.  It’s a live virus, oral vaccine.  It basically is giving your kids a mild case of Rotavirus, and since it’s live, they can pass it on to others.  We live in a developed country, I’m not worried enough about a case of diarrhea to give them a mild case.  Plus, 28% of reported side effects in 2011 had a bad reaction rate (VAERS), which is unacceptable to me.

I could go on about all the others, but that is your job as a parent.  Research the medical advice that is recommended.  Learn the risks of all the options.  Decide what is acceptable for you and your family.  Discuss it with your spouse, with other people you trust.  Go to “impartial” websites such as the CDC, WHO, etc.  Learn what the diseases actually entail.

An interesting side note is that a disease is considered “rare” if it affects less than 1 in 2000 people.  Currently, the “outbreaks” of so-called vaccine-preventable diseases affect far less than this, yet we are told they are basically epidemics by the media!  Very sad.

The last thing I want to add is that we have an amazing God who made all kinds of cures and treatments before sin was even in the world.  Yes, medical advances are amazing and save lives, but I believe many of these should be reserved for extreme cases.  There is so much knowledge that was passed down through the generations in using plants as medicines and for healing that has been lost in our modern era.  I am just starting to learn some of this, and it is an exciting journey.

Your Birth is my favorite

I read something similar the other day and was inspired!

Jeremiah, your birth is my favorite.  You are my firstborn. After being afraid that I would have a long journey becoming pregnant, I was so excited to become your mommy! In the last month of my pregnancy, I constantly thought you were coming and actually made 2 trips to the hospital where they sent me home!

The night before I went to the hospital I couldn’t sleep because I knew that you’d be coming. We went to the hospital early in the morning to induce you. During the day, so many of our family members came to visit. But you had to do things your own way and it ended up turning into a c-section. You were born at 12:12am.

When we went into the recovery room everyone was there, even at 1am! They were so excited to see and hold you.  Even though being separated from you for a few hours was hard when you went into the nursery to be checked out, it was so wonderful when I got you all to myself!

Madilynn, your birth is my favorite. You were a little stinker and decided to be “wrong side down”.  Another c-section!

But it was so nice to go to the hospital, get prepared, and be holding you an hour later!  This time only your Uncle James was there right away, but pretty soon everyone was there to meet you.

I loved all the hair you had.  All the nurses ooh’d and ahh’d over how you were able to wear bows that clipped on.

Anthony, your birth is my favorite.  It was so nice to finally avoid a c-section!  You were so punctual, being born on your due date.  And you didn’t waste your time in making your appearance.  Just like with your big sister and brother, all our family came to meet you right away.

All the nurses were so impressed with us, doing it naturally after 2 c-sections. And just like with your big sister, everyone loved all your hair!

Foster Child, your birth is my favorite.  I am so thankful that your birth mom gave you life.  Even though your world has been hard, God has a plan for you.  I have been blessed to have even a short time in your life.  I hope that the time you spend with me impacts you as much as it has impacted me.

Future child, your birth will be my favorite.  Whether God decides to bless us through you being born by a c-section, in a hospital, at home or by another mother, I will love how you entered the world to bless our lives.  I look forward to meeting you and the first memories I’ll have of you!

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